5 Tips to Combat Loneliness while Single

I can’t lie… Love Day had me in my feelings last week. There! I said it…

But the funny thing is, I wasn’t even expecting it! I actually kept forgetting about it to be honest. But all of a sudden, it was staring me in the face and I began to feel a gaping hole form inside of me. I felt incomplete, left out, forgotten… lonely. I LOVE love, I always have. So I didn’t feel envious or resentful of the couples displaying their love on this day. I simply wondered… “Where’s mine?”

As expected, my bestie, mentor, and Life Teacher (you should know who this is by now…) has been super present for this whole thing (I called and He came, like always!) and He’s been using this as a way to provide me with more wisdom about singleness and relationships. I want to spread this wealth of wisdom because… that’s the whole reason for this blog *blink blink*

Let’s talk about ways to battle loneliness while single.

  • Think about the alternative

Loneliness is always easier than settling. Just take a second to think about it…it’s not that bad compared to other things you could be dealing with by being in the wrong relationship. Better yet, think back to some of the things you had to deal with in your past relationships, and ask yourself which is worse. I don’t know about you, but 100% of the time, I’m only HAPPY to keep waiting for the right person than choosing to be with anybody just to have somebody, even if that means that I feel a little lonely from time to time.

  • Understand that you aren’t really ready

I heard a wise person once say that “the right thing at the wrong time is still the wrong thing.” God promised not to allow us to go without any good thing (Psalm 34:10), so you can believe that He isn’t going to allow your husband/wife to show up until it’s good for you.

Many times we feel loneliness when we become impatient with our single process. We think we’re ready… so why isn’t he/she showing up?! But if we spend 2 minutes taking a mental inventory of some of the issues we need to work through before our next relationship, then some of that patience will come rushing back with the quickness! You may be tired of spending your days and nights alone, but be thankful that you still have time to work on your issues! I would rather take my time preparing for something I want to last a lifetime than rush into it just because I want to have someone to cuddle with. Not a lot of cuddling happens in bad relationships anyway… remember that… *pause for dramatic effect*

  • Hang out with a dating or married couple

Now you’re probably thinking, “Won’t this make me even more aware of the fact that I’m alone??” That’s a possibility… *shrugs*… but hear me out. Every time I hang out with my best friends who are dating, something usually happens that makes me so grateful for the simplicity of my singleness. There’s usually a disagreement that happens, an uncomfortable discussion that has to take place, or demonstrations of uncomfortable compromise or sacrifice. It pretty much never fails! And as it all goes down, I’m in the background of it all… thanking God that I don’t have to go through it just yet!

But more importantly, I allow myself to learn from those moments. I learn about the work that it takes to be in a healthy relationship and what my personal stance is on certain issues that arise in relationships. I often see how they handle certain situations and think about how I would want to handle that same situation in my own relationship. And a lot of times, these moments help me to clarify the type of relationship I desire and the type of person I want to be in a relationship with.

Now there are 2 very important things to remember when doing this:

1.The relationships you surround yourself with needs to be HEALTHY! If you desire to get married, then don’t choose to “learn” from a couple who is dysfunctional, don’t share the same morals and values as you, or don